Category: 1st Mate Forum

I had been visiting my mom every 3 months at Hillcrest Health and Rehab in Nebraska where she lived for the last two years. At the end of June 2024, following several months of increasing refusal to eat much, even including her favorite foods, we decided mom should enter hospice care at the same facility. My new plan was to visit mom for one week every month.

When I visited her during the second week of July, I was not prepared for what I found. Something happened the day before I arrived that caused her health to significantly decline. When I saw her all I wanted to do was to love on her and care for her. Naively, I thought I could persuade her to eat at least her favorite foods (ice cream, chocolate) along with her favorite nutrition drink so she could regain some weight and some strength. But I was wrong. God had already decided that 82 years was all He had planned for my mom.

I saw so much and heard so much and learned so much as I stayed by her side during the next several weeks. Mom and I spent time reading together every day, as had been our regular routine for years. Who knew my mom loved romance stories? I so enjoyed hearing her giggle like a school girl while I read about a young couple sneaking a kiss. I also read mom some of the hunting and trapping articles that dad wrote years ago.

On July 15th mom told me that she was ready to go to heaven and that my dad will be worried about her until she gets there. That was the beginning of the heartwarming and heartbreaking moments between us that filled the next month.

July 15th was also the first of many times that I read the entirety of Chapter 14 of the Gospel of John out loud to my mom. It begins with Jesus telling his disciples “Do not let your hearts be troubled. You believe in God, believe also in me. My Father’s house has many rooms; if that were not so, would I have told you that I am going there to prepare a place for you? And if I go to prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you may also be where I am.”

Sometimes Jesus’ promise to come back to gather his followers and take them to Paradise to be with Him was the only comfort – for me, and for my mom. Often, taking mom outside in her wheelchair to see the baby birds in their nest, or to look for bunnies would be enough to calm mom when she was agitated, but sometimes my reading Scripture aloud to her while stroking her hair was her only comfort.

Mom often asked me to take her to Rich. Sometimes she seemed to understand that dad had died 10 years ago and other times she didn’t. I had to tell her, over and over again, that dad was in heaven and that the only way for her to get there was to wait for Jesus to come get her. These conversations involved lots of tears.

One day toward the end of July mom was mumbling something that I couldn’t understand and looking straight ahead. My daughter, Becky, asked her if she was seeing something and she replied, “I see Jesus, and angels, and Rich, and Leonard”. When asked if mom was seeing heaven, she replied “not yet”. (Leonard is mom’s brother who is in heaven.)

Another time mom asked me to “call them, call them right now”, but she couldn’t tell me who to call. Later she sat up, held her arms straight out and said, “come, come right now”. Then she asked me to comb her hair and put her shoes on her. She said she was going to Rich and that he would be mad if she showed up without her shoes on. She wore her shoes constantly for days, she wouldn’t even let me taken them off for her to sleep.

One day mom sat up and stared straight ahead. When I asked her if she sees something she replied, “Can you see her, can you see my Queen?” When I asked if she saw the Virgin Mary, mom said, “yes”. I was so happy for mom. Obviously, I couldn’t see any of these visions, but she sure could. I remember my mom telling me that her mother saw the Virgin Mary before she died years ago.

The funeral home just happened to pick this picture and Scripture verse for the prayer cards at mom’s service. How appropriate!

One day mom told me that dad was standing in the room with us and that he is “so handsome”. I so, so love that!

Mom had many visitors in the last weeks of her life. She loved seeing everyone. Her grandson, Matt, came several times to pray the rosary with mom. Usually, mom would pray along when anyone prayed Catholic prayers out loud. But one time, as Matt prayed out loud, mom folded her hands, bowed her head, and kept repeating, “I love you Jesus, help me Jesus”. After the rosary mom asked Matt to take her to Rich, because “Rich makes everything easier”. I think that is the sweetest thing I’ve ever heard her say.

There were a few things that mom said during this time that I really wasn’t expecting. Not that I expected any of this! One day mom awoke saying “ I need to go to Israel to see dad”. I don’t know if she was referring to her dad or mine, but I know I’ve never heard her talk about Israel before.

Another day she said, “there will be sorrow”. That surprised me because “sorrow” isn’t a word Americans normally use. But it is used in Scripture. I reminded mom that she is right, that we will be sad and we will miss her, but we will be happy that there will be no sorrow for her because she will be in heaven and that God has promised to wipe away every tear, and to give her a glorified body free from all this pain.

During all these visions mom never seemed scared, or even surprised. I believe mom really saw these little glimpses of heaven and that she was comforted and longed to be with Jesus and dad, and everyone who has gone before us.

I also want to join them in heaven one day. And I believe this is only possible because God, the creator of the whole world, sent His only son to be born of the Virgin Mary, crucified, died and was buried, then raised from the dead so that all who believe in Him will have eternal life with Him in heaven. I have accepted this, I believe that I will see mom in heaven one day and I pray that you will, too.

Twinkle twinkle star above-

Reminder of my Father’s love.

‘In before street lights, work hard at school’;

‘Go to church’ was her Golden Rule.

No matter my failings, deliberate or no;

All my days my mom’s love showed.

Now her hair I brush, curl and spray;

I sing and pray over her last days.

So thankful she taught me that Jesus reigns;

I trust in Him-come what may.

Bill and I, together with friends, continue volunteering at the Grand Bahama Children’s Home.

The last Friday of December 2023 Eric and Nathalie and their sons helped us continue clearing and prepping the garden. Look at the size of the sweet potatoes we found unharvested from last fall! We followed up with a pizza party for the children. And limbo! Everyone had fun, stuffed their tummies and laughed together. So fun!

This is what the garden looked like when we started working on it, verses what it looked liked after weeks of readying it for planting. Ingrid, lovable powerhouse that she is, obtained free vegetable seeds from Kelly’s Freeport True Value. Thanks Kelly’s! Now it’s planting time!

Michele really did try her best to give gardening lessons to these boys. And they listened. And they planted lettuce in this garden bed, maybe not exactly the depth and width the seeds prefer; however, I trust God will reward their efforts!

Bill and John helped the boys plant tomatoes, carrots and beets. June, the director, told us the children are more interested in eating their vegetables when they grow them themselves, so we ensured that the children labeled the vegetables they planted.

As we were just finishing up the planting, God sent a group of enthusiastic young people to pray over the Grand Bahama Children’s Home. They came out to see the garden and one of the boys asked if he could pray for the seeds to grow. How awesome is that! Hearing this little one praying that God will bless the garden he had spent weeks working on was the best.

In 1 Corinthians 3:6-9 Gods tells us “I planted the seed, Apollos watered it, but God has been making it grow. So neither the one who plants nor the one who waters is anything, but only God makes things grow. The one who plants and the one who waters have one purpose, and they will each be rewarded according to their own labor. For we are co-workers in God’s service; you are God’s field, God’s building.”

And three weeks later look how God has answered the prayer of a little boy! I see vegetables growing!

Galatians 6:9 reads, “And let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up”.

I am so thankful to have been given this opportunity to join with fellow believers as co-workers with God and the work He is doing at The Grand Bahama Children’s Home. Hmmm…God’s co-worker, not a bad way to spend retirement!

Love one another. Hmmm…how many times is that theme emphasized in Scripture? This year Bill and I were recruited (is that the word?) by Ingrid to help her garden at the Grand Bahama Children’s Home. Ingrid is an 81 year old powerhouse who has volunteered at The Grand Bahama Children’s Home (GBCH) for 30 years. She’s sweet enough to pick us up and drive us there on Fridays. We have so enjoyed loving on these children (and teasing Ingrid just enough to make her laugh).

Serve one another. That’s another thing I remember reading about in Scripture. Gardening isn’t necessarily the first thing that comes to my mind when I wake up in the morning, but I am doing it on Fridays now! I can’t do everything to serve the Bahamian people, but I can pull weeds.

And I can rejoice when God’s children innocently shout our His praise. These boys worked on this part of the garden with Ingrid for hours and then named it ‘The Garden of Eden’. That these little ones are living out their faith every day, even in the little things, sure gives me hope for the future.

Break bread together. I think that means eat pizza together. And Christmas candy! (Please give me an Amen if you agree!) The GBCH does not currently have a cook on Fridays. To meet this one need Bill, Ingrid and I put on a Christmas pizza party on the Friday before Christmas 2023. Pizza Hut delivers for $2-can’t hardly beat that. And I really do enjoy making candy while watching a Hallmark Christmas movie or two. Everyone ate to their hearts content, then ate candy canes while I read “The Candy Cane Fiasco”. Fun, fun, fun.

“I am the way, the truth and the life” proclaims Jesus (John 14:6). I have to tell you that Bill really did spend a lot of time preparing to share the Gospel with the children. However, a 10 year old pretty much summed it all up after Bill’s first question.
Bill: Why was baby Jesus born and why was He so special?
David: Jesus was born to save us from our sins and save us from hell!
Ok then, like I said before, I’m really not afraid about what the future holds because these children got it!

Bill and I are happy to be spending the winter on Grand Bahama again this year. The Bahamian people are so warm and welcoming. Ocean Reef Resort and Yacht Club (oceanreefresortmarina.com) feels like a second home.

In late November 2023, I saw a FaceBook advertisement inviting the public to the Grand Bahama Children’s Home Christmas festival which sounded like fun and a way to gather information on how to plug in there. Back in Jacksonville I love volunteering at The Nest, a Women’s Center (thenestjax.com), and I always miss that community connection and opportunity for sharing the love of Jesus when I’m away.

Together with our friends, John and Michele, Bill and I had a great time at the Christmas festival playing Bingo with the children, watching them get their faces painted and jump in the bouncy house. We were barely through the gate when we were approached by a volunteer overzealous to recruit us! Ingrid is an 81 year old Canadian who has resided on Grand Bahama, and has volunteered at The Grand Bahama Children’s Home, for 30 years. She does gardening and landscaping, as well as teaching the children how to crochet. Ingrid also volunteers at a few other places on Grand Bahama. She is a real powerhouse and a genuine pleasure to be with.

The Grand Bahama Children’s Home (gbchildrenshome.org) serves abandoned, abused and neglected children of the Northern Bahamas. They provide housing, meals, love, and support of all kinds in a Christian atmosphere for children 6 weeks to 14 years of age. They strive for every child to feel safe and loved as they learn, dream and laugh.

Ingrid picked the four of us up at 8:30 in the morning on the following Friday. We spent 4 hours cleaning up the landscaping: pulling weeds, trimming edges, and generally sprucing up the grounds. Several of the children were all too willing to help. They mostly kept our weed buckets emptied and dumped the wheelbarrow when it got full. Eventually the boys eyed our tools and asked to use them but the we thought best not to set them loose with our hedge trimmers and pruning shears!

We learned quite a bit about the great work The Grand Bahama Children’s Home provides and we will be back to lend our support. We ended the day with a delicious meal with Ingrid at the Taino Beach Resort.